My wife and I are really looking forward to the birth of our child. Around 5 more weeks and our precious one will have “arrived”.
Recently we’ve been guests at the Prophetic Conference “Hear His Voice” at the GZD church in Dabringhausen, near Bonn. The guest speakers there were Ivan and Isabel Allum from London, Ontario. My wife Corrie knows them from her times of living and getting equipped in Toronto, Canada and they have known each other for about 14 years now. Corrie has had the honour to translate their book “Your Destiny : Unlocking the impossible promises of God” into German a few years ago and they enjoy a connection based on trust and friendship.
Therefore, it was also my pleasure to finally meet Ivan and Isabel for the first time. Isabel – bless her heart – thanked me for making Corrie so happy. I can only pass the thanks and the glory on to God, as He is the one who has helped me to grow into the man and husband I am today. And I still got quite a few things to learn, believe me.
During the conference, we met up with the host family where my mother in law stayed during the few days we went there. A lady called Ruth invited us in and we started chatting. As Corrie’s pregnancy has become more and more evident in recent weeks, it was of course one of the topics we talked about. Ruth asked us, if we knew the sex of the baby and if we had already picked a name for it. We confirmed, that we had talked about names right at the start of the pregnancy and had agreed on versions for both sexes very quickly.
Well, to our surprise Ruth carried on, by asking whether we knew if the names we picked were also God’s first choice for our child? I got a little uncomfortable, as I had gotten very used to the names we had picked. Ruth had a friendly and winning way of challenging us to pray and ask our Heavenly Dad, which name He thinks is fitting God’s calling on the child’s life.
So we got together and prayed, but the only person who really got an impression she wished to share, was my Mom in Law. She mentioned that she had been given part of the calling the child would have and also a name. She gave us that name on a piece of paper and it was slightly different from what Corrie and I had previously agreed on. However, it was a name, Corrie had thought of, just before we slightly changed it, talking about various names.
That night, we went back to the church and Corrie and Isabel happened to bump into each other near the restrooms. Isabel asked Corrie, if we already knew the sex of the child and Corrie confirmed that we did, but she didn’t reveal what it was. Isabel went on to tell her the correct sex and a name, of which she said this was the name God has spoken over the child. It was the same name we had been given in the afternoon and also the same name, Corrie had originally on her heart.
Ok, now I have to admit, I was slightly disappointed and felt a bit hurt in my pride as a father. However, I have no problem submitting to the Eternal One, who is Love in person and knows best, without any ulterior motives. So I agreed that we would change the name back to Corrie’s original choice, even though she was slightly uncomfortable with that, too, for reasons we won’t be able to reveal until the baby is born. 😉
Since then, I started calling the baby by this different name, whenever I spoke to it, through Corrie’s belly. And it is funny, as well as kind of crazy to experience, how much more responsive the child seems, when it is being called by that special name.
We’ve previously been talking to the child, calling it by the name we had chosen together and there wasn’t anywhere near as much movement in Corrie’s womb as there is now, whenever we’re using this special name.
We believe it is really astonishing to experience how God has already been calling our child by it’s name and feel it is already used to being called that. That’s why we get such a happy response whenever we’re using this name now.
I guess that’s been settled then and I can’t wait to meet our firstborn child in person.
I was astonished and perplex when Corrie’s small, but excellent Email reached me at the beginning of October 2012. The weeks prior to receiving her message I had spent some time with her via Facebook and Skype. I was able to minister to her with the help of God’s (Agape) love in my heart as much as she was prepared to receive. But it was not my intention to win Corrie for a love relationship.
We had been loosely connected friends for some years and had initially met each other during a Christian conference about the love of God the Father. We had met each other every now and then through joined friends and also online.
During the weeks prior to the mentioned Email I was just there for her when she wasn’t very well after her relationship to another guy had failed. I just offered an open ear and was one of her encouragers.
Our friendship wasn’t going beyond a chat from time to time and some practical help with computer issues. Well, that’s what I thought at least.
I was quite blind emotionally until October 2012 and I didn’t realize the good things that were coming up on the horizon of my life.
At the end of 2011 I made a comment to my Mom, that was meant to be a dry joke, but was also partially serious. We had discussed the chances that I’d bring some grandchildren home some day and I asked her to prepare herself to see me becoming a monk very soon. I think I left her quite shocked and hurt. I’m sorry about that today.
My situation looked like a one way street in my view. God’s overview was and is much better!
I had my first serious relationship between 1998 and 1999. The girl pretended to be a Christian, to do me a favour. I can’t really remember why we broke up. But I was definitely not ready for this kind of commitment at the time. A few months later I had another relationship with a girl with whom I shared some precious days. Todays she’s married to the right guy and it wasn’t meant to be me.
But I was meant to be married since May 2005. My then fiancé and I attended a theological seminary together and had planned to get married after the first school year. 2 weeks before the wedding date it all went pear shaped. It was her decision and I’m yet to find out the reason for it. But I’m sure it wasn’t easy and equally painful for both of us.
The years after that were years of pain and healing. I didn’t really long for another relationship of this kind and kind of got used to the idea of being single after a while. The flame of longing for a partner was kindled every now and then, but I blew it out pretty soon. I said to God, if there was to be a wife, she shouldn’t be German or from Saxony at all. She was to be a mixture of a woman coming from Asia and Africa. I pretty much made it extra difficult, so I didn’t have to go through the same stuff again.
2007 I moved to Wales in the UK. I was working in the youth ministry of a local church. During this time I also got to now people from a group called Emerge Wales. Today there are two groups called Company of Burning Hearts and The New Ecstatics. Both my local church family and people from these groups welcomed me with much love. A lot of time and blessings was invested into me and I’m very thankful to all involved.
2009 marked the beginning of a big physical change for me. I had suffered with back pain for a while and my local GP drastically told me that I had to lose weight otherwise the issue wouldn’t go away. So I began to do a lot of research online and in my local library to find methods for long term weight loss. I didn’t want any fad diets or short term solutions, but I was after ways of changing my eating habits and changing my life. Until Christmas 2011 I lost 143 pounds and kept my weight at that new level since then.
God, our Heavenly Daddy also used those 4 years of physical change to massively work on my inner self. Local friends have told me time and time again that my physical change also came with an improvement of my character and maturity.
Ok, back to October 2012:
I replied to Corrie’s Email and was careful to use the right words. I didn’t want to discourage her and wanted to honour her courage. But I wasn’t really open for a love relationship of this kind. Well, at least not yet.
So I made the suggestion that we would continue to spend time with each other and for us to take things slowly, one step at a time. I also wanted to take some time to chat to God about these things. Corrie thought my suggestion was mature and had no problem going along with it.
God really worked overtime on my heart during the coming weeks and on the 12th of November 2012 I had reached the point of no return. I told Corrie that I was prepared to enter into this relationship with her, under the condition that we’d both take this seriously and that we would have the aim to get married eventually. That was as much my thought as it was hers.
None of my previous relationships were formed in the way it is between Corrie and I. Within just a few weeks we won such a level of trust and emotional security, I can only stand amazed at God’s work. There are so many moments that we call our “High Five Moments”. Situations in which we realise, that we have shared passions, share thoughts, the same point of view about something, similar plans and many more shared things.
When I’m talking to friends and family about “us” I have often said that it feels like we’re twins in spiritual matters. We’re different in our personality and character, but in a way that we complete each other.
We’re now on a joined journey. We’re still separated from each other locally for longer periods. I’m here in Wales as God has called me here. I’m no longer part of the youth ministry, but I’m one of the leaders of the local church since September 2011. I’m also helping with the churches’ media ministry, take care of our church website, the Facebook page and our newsletter. The church is financially not in a situation to be able to employ full time ministers, so I’m also having a day to day full time job at the customer service office of the largest British retailer.
Corrie lives and works in the east of Germany. This situation isn’t easy for both of us. We try and Skype and phone each other as often as possible and also try to make visits.
I made my first visit to Corrie and her family around New Year of 2013. I was amazed and thankful to experience God’s hand at work in those few days. The connection to Corrie’s family was almost instant. I had a good connection to many of her relatives and family friends. Corrie’s Mom offered me to call her Mom, too. And I felt like I had known her middle brother Christian for years.
I’m very happy and filled with excitement looking at our joined future.
Can I ask you to pray for us? Especially during these days people in relationships need brothers and sisters that stand with them.
Corrie and I would also be happy to hear from our readers. Drop us a note if you like.
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Als ich Anfang Oktober 2012 Corrie’s kleine, aber feine Email erhielt, war ich erstmal ziemlich erstaunt. Ich hatte die Wochen davor online und via Skype ein wenig Zeit mit ihr verbracht und mit Hilfe der Liebe Gottes in meinem Herzen (Agape Liebe) ihr gedient so gut sie es zuließ. Dahinter stand nicht die Absicht Corrie für eine Liebesbeziehung zu gewinnen.
Wir waren seit einigen Jahren locker befreundet und hatten uns erstmals auf einer Konferenz über die Vaterliebe Gottes gesehen. Durch gemeinsame Freunde hat man sich ab und an mal getroffen oder eben auch online gesehen.
In den Wochen vor der besagten Email war einfach für sie da, als es ihr nach ihrer Trennung nicht gut ging. Hatte ein offenes Ohr und war einer ihrer Ermutiger.
Unsere Freundschaft ging über ab und an mal chatten oder praktischer Hilfe bei Computer Problemen nicht hinaus. So dachte ich das zumindest.
Ich war bis Oktober 2012 glaube ich ziemlich emotional blind und hab nicht gemerkt, was sich da Gutes anbahnte.
Ende 2011 machte ich meine Mutter gegenüber einen Scherz, der beinahe ernst gemeint war. Wir unterhielten uns über die Chance das ich ihr irgendwann mal noch Enkelkinder schenken würde und ich sagte ihr sie solle sich darauf vorbereiten, dass ich Mönch werden würde. Ich glaub ich hab sie damit geschockt und verletzt. Heute tut mir das leid.
Meine Situation sah nach meiner Ansicht nach Einbahnstraße aus. Gott hatte und hat da einen viel besseren Überblick!
Meine erste ernsthafte Beziehung hatte ich 1998 bis 1999, mit einem Mädel welches mir zu liebe so tat als wäre sie Christ. Woran die Beziehung zerbrach, weiß ich gar nicht mehr. Aber reif dafür war ich damals nicht. Danach gab es ein weiteres Mädel in meinem Leben mit welcher ich kostbare Tage verbrachte. Heute ist sie mit dem richtigen Mann verheiratet und das sollte nicht ich sein.
Eigentlich sollte ich seit Mai 2005 verheiratet sein. Ich bin mit meiner damaligen Verlobten gemeinsam ins Theologiestudium gegangen und nach dem ersten Schuljahr hatten wir geplant zu heiraten. 2 Wochen vor dem Hochzeitstermin platzte die ganze Geschichte. Es war ihr Entscheidung und eine Begründung kenne ich bis heute nicht. Allerdings bin ich mir sicher, dass es für uns beide schmerzhaft und nicht einfach war.
Die Jahre danach waren geprägt von Schmerz und Heilung. Ich hatte nicht das Bedürfnis nach einer weiteren Beziehung dieser Art und hatte mich nach einer Weile damit abgefunden Single zu sein. Es flammte ab und an mal der Gedanke auf, dass ich doch eine Freundin suchen könnte. Aber das unterdrückte ich schnell wieder. Ich sagte zu Gott, wenn es denn eine Frau für mich geben sollte, dann dürfte sie keine Deutsche und niemand aus Sachsen sein. Sie sollte auch eine Mischung aus einem asiatischen und afrikanischen Aussehen haben. Im Nachhinein betrachtet sehe ich, dass ich es Gott extra schwer machte, um weitere Situationen dieser Art zu vermeiden.
2007 kam ich nach Wales in Großbritannien. Hier war ich ein paar Jahre ehrenamtlich in der Jugendarbeit einer örtlichen Gemeinde aktiv. In dieser Zeit lernte ich auch Leute von Emerge Wales kennen. Mittlerweile gibt es zwei Gruppen: Company of Burning Hearts und The New Ecstatics. Sowohl in meiner Ortsgemeinde, als auch bei diesen Gruppen wurde ich mit viel Liebe aufgenommen. Es wurde viel Zeit und Segen in mich investiert und ich bin allen sehr dankbar.
2009 begann ein großer körperlicher Umbruch. Mein Rücken schmerzte sehr und mein Hausarzt herrschte mich an, dass ich abnehmen müsse, sonst würde sich da nichts bessern. Also begann ich viel online und in der Bücherei zu forschen nach Methoden zum abnehmen, welche keine kurzfristigen Diäten waren, sondern von Dauer und eher Ernährungsumstellung als Diät. Bis Weihnachten 2011 nahm ich über 63 kg ab und hab das Gewicht bis heute gehalten.
In diesen 4 Jahren begann unser Himmlischer Papa auch sehr intensiv an meinem Innern zu arbeiten. Freunde hier vor Ort haben mir immer wieder gesagt, wie ich nicht nur Gewicht verloren habe, sondern auch an Charakter und Reife gewonnen habe.
Zurück zu Oktober 2012:
Ich antwortete Corrie auf ihre Email und bemühte mich um die richtigen Worte. Ich wollte sie nicht abschrecken und ihren Mut belohnen. Aber ich war auch nicht offen für eine Liebesbeziehung. Noch nicht.
Also schlug ich vor, dass wir weiterhin Zeit miteinander verbringen und die Dinge Schritt für Schritt angehen. Ich wollte mir auch Zeit nehmen, mit Gott darüber zu reden. Corrie fand diesen Vorschlag sehr vernünftig und willigte ein.
In den kommenden Wochen werkelte Gott ordentlich an meinem Herzen und in meinen Gedanken. am 12.11.12 war es dann soweit. Ich ließ Corrie wissen, dass ich mich auf unsere Beziehung einlassen wollte, wenn wir es beide Ernst meinten und wir das Ziel Ehe vor Augen haben. Das war genauso ihr Gedanke wir meiner.
Keine meiner vorherigen Beziehungen war so aufgebaut wie die zwischen Corrie und mir. Innerhalb weniger Wochen hat sich zwischen uns so eine Vertrautheit und Geborgenheit entwickelt. Ich kann Gottes Werk nur bestaunen. Wir haben so viele Momente, welche wir unsere “High Five Moments” nennen. Situationen in denen wir feststellen, dass wir gemeinsame Leidenschaften haben, Gedanken teilen, die gleiche Meinung zu etwas haben, ähnliche Pläne machen und vieles mehr.
Meinen Freunden und Verwandten gegenüber habe ich oft gesagt: “Geistlich könnten wir Zwillinge sein. Vom der Persönlichkeit und dem Charakter her sind wir jedoch ziemlich verschieden, aber in einer gut ergänzenden Weise.”
Wir sind nun gemeinsam unterwegs. Räumlich sind wir momentan leider für längere Zeiten getrennt. Ich bin hier in Wales auf Gottes Berufung hin. Mittlerweile bin ich nicht mehr in der Jugendarbeit aktiv, aber bin seit September 2011 im Leitungsteam der Gemeinde. Außerdem arbeite ich im Gemeinde Mediendienst, kümmere mich um die Webseite, Facebook Seite und unseren Gemeindebrief. Da die Gemeinde es momentan finanziell nicht schaffen würde die Gemeindeleiter anzustellen, habe ich auch noch einen Vollzeit Job bei der größten Einzelhandelskette von Großbritannien. Hier bin ich im Büro beschäftigt.
Corrie lebt und arbeitet noch im Osten Deutschlands. Diese Situation ist nicht einfach für uns. Wir telefonieren und Skypen so oft wir können und bemühen uns auch um Besuche.
Mein erster Besuch bei ihr und Familie war um Neujahr 2013. Ich war erstaunt und dankbar wie sehr ich Gott am Werk sah in diesen paar Tagen. Die Verbindung zu Corrie’s Familie war sehr schnell da. Mit vielen ihrer Verwandten und Familienfreunden habe ich mich sehr schnell sehr gut verstanden. Corrie’s Mutti darf ich auch schon Mutti nennen und ihr Bruder Christian kommt mir so vor als kenne ich ihn seit Jahren.
Ich bin sehr glücklich und gespannt auf die vor uns liegende Zeit.
Würdest du bitte für uns beten? Gerade heute brauchen Beziehungen Beistand.
Corrie und uns würden uns freuen von unseren Lesern zu hören. Meld dich doch mal.
glorycorrie & potamos 